And here we go!
See you Tuesday!
Sunday, November 1, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
And here's the other side...
In an effort to keep it "fair and balanced" and real, I'm just confessing that hearing the word, "mom" accompanied by a request for another need (or more commonly, a WANT) was truly getting on my last nerve last night and this morning. It was absolutely nothing they were doing wrong or that was outside what is to be expected, but I really had to go pray for my attitude because Tony is in Ohio, and Jenna is on a Christian retreat with her school, so there was nobody else for them to go to except for "mom"!!! Then, their other teacher threw out her neck during her move, so I found out this morning I'm "on" for school! S-I-G-H. Mama said there'd be days like this.
Here's another little "quirk". They will not go to another floor of our home or a room where no one is without someone going with them because they're scared. In fact, one has to accompany the other and hang out in the bathroom for the fear of this "monster" lurking around our house. Last night with just the 3 of us, I had to peel them off my arms as we were going upstairs! It's been a long time since we had to help children to get over the "bogey-man". Any suggestions?!
The day's gone ok, by the way, in spite of my original "want to run away" attitude. Most of it is just having the serenity to accept the things I cannot change!
Here's another little "quirk". They will not go to another floor of our home or a room where no one is without someone going with them because they're scared. In fact, one has to accompany the other and hang out in the bathroom for the fear of this "monster" lurking around our house. Last night with just the 3 of us, I had to peel them off my arms as we were going upstairs! It's been a long time since we had to help children to get over the "bogey-man". Any suggestions?!
The day's gone ok, by the way, in spite of my original "want to run away" attitude. Most of it is just having the serenity to accept the things I cannot change!
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
"Singin' in the Rain...."
Tonight we did something I haven't done....maybe EVER! It's really been raining here the past two days, and Tony and Maggie took a walk with umbrellas yesterday. Tonight, Ginger and I joined Tony and Maggie. We made it down to one end of the street pretty dry with 3 umbrellas and a raincoat, but somehow, it got a little out of control as we discovered the water poured down the curb. It started with an innocent splash and turned into umbrellas being thrown down and an all-out water war starting. Ginger and I even had a running race down the street, and she is FAST (or I'm old...!) I couldn't catch her! We were all completely drenched as we made it up to the house, as you can imagine, but nothing that a washing machine and warm showers couldn't take care of. Once again, some huge fun that never would have happened without them!
Doctors, Dentists and clothes, oh my!
When you bring in two new children into your life, there are days when you feel like they are the sun and you are the planet orbiting around them! They need everything! You go to the pediatrician, and they needs many blood tests to make sure they're healthy, and it turns into half of your day when the nurse and the nurse practicioner can't get any blood out of them! I know they felt like pin cushions, and I am amazed that they took it like two Marines! They were so brave! And they've been so good for their 8 shots within the last 2 months as we attempt to get their immunizations up to date. However, they have learned well as new American children, and cut their deal on the way home since they had "suffered" so much. We laughed as we heard just how much their English skills had developed as they said, "ok, ice cream, TWO TV shows, and no shower!" And Maggie was very good when she had to get medicine to take care of a parasite she had. They were so cute as partners: Maggie held her nose and Ginger poured the pink medicine in her mouth (which, by the way, was the most expensive medicine this family has ever had to have!)
Today's adventure included a 2-1/2 hour dentist visit with two cleanings and one minor filling. The good news is that their teeth, like their hair and nails, are very healthy and it's looking like we've dodged the "braces bullet" too. The interesting part was that the dentist looked at their panoramic X-rays, saw the full development of their 12 year molars and said that he thinks they're more like 12 years old than 10. Hmmmm.....another clue!
And just when you think you've got them clothed with some fun, cute and functional things, the season changes and now they need all winter things! They are very fun to shop with! Like their big sister, they are all into shopping and fashion, and they know what they like and what they don't. They still like to please, though, as 10 (or 11, or 12) year olds, and will wear something if encouraged enough!
With all the work that's gone into it, I wouldn't go back and change anything! It's truly a joy to not only have a way to serve the Lord every day through taking care of these new daughters, but it's a joy to experience all the ways they pour blessings into our lives! God has truly equipped us as parents of Ginger & Maggie along with Ryan, Joel and Jenna.
Today's adventure included a 2-1/2 hour dentist visit with two cleanings and one minor filling. The good news is that their teeth, like their hair and nails, are very healthy and it's looking like we've dodged the "braces bullet" too. The interesting part was that the dentist looked at their panoramic X-rays, saw the full development of their 12 year molars and said that he thinks they're more like 12 years old than 10. Hmmmm.....another clue!
And just when you think you've got them clothed with some fun, cute and functional things, the season changes and now they need all winter things! They are very fun to shop with! Like their big sister, they are all into shopping and fashion, and they know what they like and what they don't. They still like to please, though, as 10 (or 11, or 12) year olds, and will wear something if encouraged enough!
With all the work that's gone into it, I wouldn't go back and change anything! It's truly a joy to not only have a way to serve the Lord every day through taking care of these new daughters, but it's a joy to experience all the ways they pour blessings into our lives! God has truly equipped us as parents of Ginger & Maggie along with Ryan, Joel and Jenna.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Wired for speed!
If you've been following this blog, you know we've had a struggle with car sickness, and I'm glad to say that this is no longer a struggle, even from the very back with no windows down, and even when they read in the car! I think they have acclimated to our very driving-intensive culture now! But honestly, I had no hope of them being good with the water and all the entertainment available there with motion sickness being an issue for them. So I was amazed when we went up to Lake Lanier, and the girls tried out the pool AND boating AND jet skiing AND tubing, and they didn't just not get sick one minute, but they loved it! They wanted to go faster both on the jet skis and in tubing! It's a 3-person tube, so their maiden tubing voyage was with their mother, who is most definitely wired for speed and wild rides. I had a blast with them! They called the pool "little water" and the lake "big water"! We went up the next week and watched them learn to kick in the pool from teacher Jenna, and Ginger even mastered putting her face in the water. Next summer will definitely include swimming lessons, and I already have their teacher all picked out!
I wonder how they will do at SIX FLAGS!!! Because their mom went there for her 40th birthday to make sure I still had it in me to ride every single ride, (except the one old roller coaster that beats you to death and rattles your brain around inside your head!) We'll keep you posted! But it's very cool that they continue to fit into their new place as Amburgy kids!
I wonder how they will do at SIX FLAGS!!! Because their mom went there for her 40th birthday to make sure I still had it in me to ride every single ride, (except the one old roller coaster that beats you to death and rattles your brain around inside your head!) We'll keep you posted! But it's very cool that they continue to fit into their new place as Amburgy kids!
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Overdue for an update!
Time has flown by, and I have thought how I needed to update this blog dozens of times. The biggest reason for the delay is because of the decision we made for the girls' school and education (which is where I left off the last entry). That week was one filled with many meetings. We met with the public elementary school for half a day, and then we went back to Perimeter Christian School (where Jenna, Joel and Ryan went for grades 1-8) and met with the middle school principal. The public school, while amazingly over 60% Asian in its student population and filled with very nice teachers we met that day, still gave us big concerns. They were inflexible on which grade they would be - if 10 years, then 5th grade; if 11 years, then middle school would be where they would start. Fifth graders already change classes there, so the girls would be adjusting to 4 different core class teachers. The ESL teacher (English as Second Language) was Russian and just not very clear in her...well, English! This, on top of knowing that the girls spiritual foundation would not be growing there, that we would not have time for much else trying to keep up with all they needed to be doing, knowing that Public Middle School (I've not heard good things about our middle school) would be right around the corner, and knowing there would be teaching coming that does not fit our beliefs (i.e. evolution) just filled me with more stress and not much peace. On the other hand...the decision to home school felt so heavy and so life-changing for me.
The decision came clear with our meeting with Perimeter's middle school teacher, Jodie Brawner. I am so thankful for her insight and networking that was still available to us as a wonderful gift, even though we hadn't been a part of the school for over a year with our youngest biological child graduating from there. The biggest gift she gave was telling me about Perimeter's Home School Satellite Program, which I found out includes a Certified, experienced Fulton County Teacher who handles all the administration and county requirements, is very knowledgeable in curriculum, is available for counsel when I need it, and gives us the ability to join Perimeter Christian School for special activities like the Arts Festival and the Veterans Day Program that I already know so well. A huge weight lifted off me at that point. I met with Dana, the consultant, and she gave me some great counsel for curriculum, like science and math. I was well on my way and had great peace.
But God wasn't finished giving me things I didn't even realize I needed at that time. I did sense that my life was not yet back in balance, with some areas of my responsibility being neglected (like honestly, the power almost got turned off on our house because I just hadn't gotten the mail opened and the bills paid like I normally do so easily!) I went to my dear friend, Jenni Justmann, another adoptive mom of a daughter from China who home schools, because she has been such a great cheerleader for me. She has a Christian woman living in their apartment who used to teach 5th grade at Perimeter Christian School, but is no longer able to do this full time because of disabilities from a bad car accident. I asked her if she would consider helping me teach the girls, and fast forward to the end result of that, she is now helping me out 2 days a week, and we are finding that we are a perfect complement for each other. For example, she LOVES science, and I DON'T! It really helps the girls to have another teacher so that we're not together ALL the time, and when we have an issue come up, I have some very real teaching experience and a fresh perspective to help (for example, math and Maggie just don't like each other very well, and it was so nice to pass that over to Mary for her help.
The last piece that fell perfectly in place is a home school outsource called "Artios", which teaches History, Art, Music and Drama. This is on Mondays, all day, and again gives me some help in subjects that aren't necessarily my passion and one more day to take care of the other things in my life. This is a Christian based curriculum, so when they hear about things like the founding of America, they are hearing it from a perspective I want them to learn, while surrounded by Christian teachers and other home-schooled students. They are adjusting very well to this, and the teacher's aid who is with them in all their classes "just happened" to adopt a school age child from a European, non-English speaking country! Her daughter is in their classes and is helping Ginger and Maggie!
Tony and I sat down at Starbucks Sunday night a few weeks ago and hammered out our schedule to make sure I had his help in special places, so I can continue working out, and not having to be running crazy trying to pick up 3 daughters in opposite sides of town at the same time! He has been so supportive! He even took them on a field trip so I could get those bills paid on our first week of home schooling! They went to "Yellow River Wild Game Ranch" and saw many great animals!
Some other very cool things I just have to share: May Chun got me 2 Chinese English Bibles, enabling our Bible Study to go so much deeper and faster. We just finished a 2 week study of the life of Joseph! They read it in Chinese, and then we summarize the chapters in English with them hearing it and writing it down in their notebooks. I am amazed at how well they are learning English words and sentence structure by doing this. We are also studying some classic literature that my friend, Lissa Hopwood, who is ministering in Beijing, got for us in Chinese! Ginger just finished "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe", and Maggie just finished "Pollyanna", and great story about an orphan who brings her sunny, thankful outlook on life to turn her Aunt Polly's structured, stable, boring life upside down! We are having fun discussing the books in English!
I am amazed at how God's provision has just "rained down" on us. I am in awe of His continued blessings! It reminds me of a saying I heard: "God doesn't call the equipped; He equips the called." I had no clue of any of these things I have just written about even 3 months ago, but they are in place now! For all of you parents who are feeling God's tug on your heart strings for adoption, I hope this gives you comfort!
The decision came clear with our meeting with Perimeter's middle school teacher, Jodie Brawner. I am so thankful for her insight and networking that was still available to us as a wonderful gift, even though we hadn't been a part of the school for over a year with our youngest biological child graduating from there. The biggest gift she gave was telling me about Perimeter's Home School Satellite Program, which I found out includes a Certified, experienced Fulton County Teacher who handles all the administration and county requirements, is very knowledgeable in curriculum, is available for counsel when I need it, and gives us the ability to join Perimeter Christian School for special activities like the Arts Festival and the Veterans Day Program that I already know so well. A huge weight lifted off me at that point. I met with Dana, the consultant, and she gave me some great counsel for curriculum, like science and math. I was well on my way and had great peace.
But God wasn't finished giving me things I didn't even realize I needed at that time. I did sense that my life was not yet back in balance, with some areas of my responsibility being neglected (like honestly, the power almost got turned off on our house because I just hadn't gotten the mail opened and the bills paid like I normally do so easily!) I went to my dear friend, Jenni Justmann, another adoptive mom of a daughter from China who home schools, because she has been such a great cheerleader for me. She has a Christian woman living in their apartment who used to teach 5th grade at Perimeter Christian School, but is no longer able to do this full time because of disabilities from a bad car accident. I asked her if she would consider helping me teach the girls, and fast forward to the end result of that, she is now helping me out 2 days a week, and we are finding that we are a perfect complement for each other. For example, she LOVES science, and I DON'T! It really helps the girls to have another teacher so that we're not together ALL the time, and when we have an issue come up, I have some very real teaching experience and a fresh perspective to help (for example, math and Maggie just don't like each other very well, and it was so nice to pass that over to Mary for her help.
The last piece that fell perfectly in place is a home school outsource called "Artios", which teaches History, Art, Music and Drama. This is on Mondays, all day, and again gives me some help in subjects that aren't necessarily my passion and one more day to take care of the other things in my life. This is a Christian based curriculum, so when they hear about things like the founding of America, they are hearing it from a perspective I want them to learn, while surrounded by Christian teachers and other home-schooled students. They are adjusting very well to this, and the teacher's aid who is with them in all their classes "just happened" to adopt a school age child from a European, non-English speaking country! Her daughter is in their classes and is helping Ginger and Maggie!
Tony and I sat down at Starbucks Sunday night a few weeks ago and hammered out our schedule to make sure I had his help in special places, so I can continue working out, and not having to be running crazy trying to pick up 3 daughters in opposite sides of town at the same time! He has been so supportive! He even took them on a field trip so I could get those bills paid on our first week of home schooling! They went to "Yellow River Wild Game Ranch" and saw many great animals!
Some other very cool things I just have to share: May Chun got me 2 Chinese English Bibles, enabling our Bible Study to go so much deeper and faster. We just finished a 2 week study of the life of Joseph! They read it in Chinese, and then we summarize the chapters in English with them hearing it and writing it down in their notebooks. I am amazed at how well they are learning English words and sentence structure by doing this. We are also studying some classic literature that my friend, Lissa Hopwood, who is ministering in Beijing, got for us in Chinese! Ginger just finished "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe", and Maggie just finished "Pollyanna", and great story about an orphan who brings her sunny, thankful outlook on life to turn her Aunt Polly's structured, stable, boring life upside down! We are having fun discussing the books in English!
I am amazed at how God's provision has just "rained down" on us. I am in awe of His continued blessings! It reminds me of a saying I heard: "God doesn't call the equipped; He equips the called." I had no clue of any of these things I have just written about even 3 months ago, but they are in place now! For all of you parents who are feeling God's tug on your heart strings for adoption, I hope this gives you comfort!
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
It's almost been a month....
Our legal adoption of Ginger and Maggie was 6/24/09, so we're right on one month together. Overall, I would say that God has done "exceeding abundantly over what we could have asked or imagined." The girls have bonded to our family and we have bonded to them. While we were in Guangzhou, we got our family picture taken and we ordered a charcoal drawing of us. It just arrived today, and I think it's beautiful - as I look at it, they just look like they have belonged with us always. They have laughed hard, played hard, and thrown themselves wholeheartedly into our family a hundred different ways and made us laugh that many times as well. I came home today and Ryan was lying on the floor letting them put his hair into TWENTY tiny ponytails all over his head. It almost looked like we had a big black baby in the family except that the hair was RED! :o) Never a dull moment. Last night I had to get up and remind Tony as he was stirring them up at bed time and Maggie's volume got louder and louder that we have to LIVE with her habits for a long time and to cool it! That girl has a set of opera lungs on her. Women in my family are loud, but she is the LOUDEST - I would place a large bet on it! We just had dinner; food is going much better, and I just came home from our Asian supermarket with a HUGE 25 pound bag of white rice because I am tired of buying little 5 pound bags that are gone in 4 days! People ask how we communicate all the time, and I would say that it "just happens"! Sometimes with gestures, sometimes showing them with our actions accompanying our words, sometimes with a Chinese-English dictionary, sometimes with actual real learned English words (and a few Chinese words) being exchanged back and forth! You can always tell when real communication has been accomplished by their bright eyes, their smiles and their cooperation, OR their confused, blank expressions that tell you that you need to try again!
We have had some up close encounters with the "darker sides" of their temperaments; lest those of you in the process of adopting think that everything's beautiful all the time! I've already written about Maggie's (and my) mini-meltdown the first week. The second week, I would summarize as a mini-showdown with Ginger. I have definitely encountered her strong will that Michael told us about. She has tried twice now to give me the silent treatment - it started when I was home schooling her and she wouldn't answer me. She is normally a bright, attentive, helpful student, "firing on all pistons", so this was a huge contrast. No amount of talking would bring her out of it, and she was willing to suffer hunger rather than answer me with a "yes please" when I asked her if she wanted lunch, as well as isolation in her room. We talked through it the next day (I was quite impressed with myself as a teacher and I know they got it because of their reactions). I thought we could scratch that lesson as complete, but today, 5 days later,I encountered the same thing. After speaking quite clearly to her that rudeness will get her nowhere in this family except lost privileges (which again, she was willing to sacrifice for whatever her "cause" was), I decided to try another method with her; the idea of which came from a book I recommend highly for adoptive families called "The Connected Child". I decided that if she was going to not speak to me, that she was going to have to do it while in my "kind but firm" presence, working by my side with extra chores. She helped with laundry, bringing in groceries, putting them away, peeling potatoes, taking out trash. I actually caught her smiling at one point, showing her icey heart had cracked once again. She's back! And she's great help, by the way! And I'm only half-exhausted from her, and half-exhausted from my miserable cold!
We also have experienced an encounter with what I believe was a fear and anger-induced reaction from Maggie. She has been doing fine with riding in the car, as long as the window was down and she was in the front seat. Tony, Jenna and the girls went out for dinner last night, and Jenna decided she was going to pull out her "I'm the big sister" card and get her front seat status back as they went from Zaxby's to Chick-Fil-A for ice cream and to see Joel there at work. As soon as they stopped, Maggie jumped out of the car and went running away as fast as she could, right along 141 which is a very busy road. Several yells and a minor car chase later, she was back under control and in safety. Wow! What was that? As I thought about it, I believe she truly is afraid of being sick and was angry that we were subjecting her to it. I think we need to do a better job of communicating our idea that she can actually learn to sit by the window in the 2nd seat and not have any trouble like that again.
I will close my novella with a request that you keep us in your prayers, and not just to cover any future escapades like I have told above. We will be working on our final education decision for them next week, as well as their first American pediatrician appointment. We truly believe they are older than their records indicate, and want to see how they graph out on the Asian growth chart as "just turned" 10 year olds! I am placing my bet right now that they'll be completely off the chart huge for that! We do have the option of changing their birth year as we readopt them in the U.S., so pray for wisdom in both of these "gray" areas.
We have had some up close encounters with the "darker sides" of their temperaments; lest those of you in the process of adopting think that everything's beautiful all the time! I've already written about Maggie's (and my) mini-meltdown the first week. The second week, I would summarize as a mini-showdown with Ginger. I have definitely encountered her strong will that Michael told us about. She has tried twice now to give me the silent treatment - it started when I was home schooling her and she wouldn't answer me. She is normally a bright, attentive, helpful student, "firing on all pistons", so this was a huge contrast. No amount of talking would bring her out of it, and she was willing to suffer hunger rather than answer me with a "yes please" when I asked her if she wanted lunch, as well as isolation in her room. We talked through it the next day (I was quite impressed with myself as a teacher and I know they got it because of their reactions). I thought we could scratch that lesson as complete, but today, 5 days later,I encountered the same thing. After speaking quite clearly to her that rudeness will get her nowhere in this family except lost privileges (which again, she was willing to sacrifice for whatever her "cause" was), I decided to try another method with her; the idea of which came from a book I recommend highly for adoptive families called "The Connected Child". I decided that if she was going to not speak to me, that she was going to have to do it while in my "kind but firm" presence, working by my side with extra chores. She helped with laundry, bringing in groceries, putting them away, peeling potatoes, taking out trash. I actually caught her smiling at one point, showing her icey heart had cracked once again. She's back! And she's great help, by the way! And I'm only half-exhausted from her, and half-exhausted from my miserable cold!
We also have experienced an encounter with what I believe was a fear and anger-induced reaction from Maggie. She has been doing fine with riding in the car, as long as the window was down and she was in the front seat. Tony, Jenna and the girls went out for dinner last night, and Jenna decided she was going to pull out her "I'm the big sister" card and get her front seat status back as they went from Zaxby's to Chick-Fil-A for ice cream and to see Joel there at work. As soon as they stopped, Maggie jumped out of the car and went running away as fast as she could, right along 141 which is a very busy road. Several yells and a minor car chase later, she was back under control and in safety. Wow! What was that? As I thought about it, I believe she truly is afraid of being sick and was angry that we were subjecting her to it. I think we need to do a better job of communicating our idea that she can actually learn to sit by the window in the 2nd seat and not have any trouble like that again.
I will close my novella with a request that you keep us in your prayers, and not just to cover any future escapades like I have told above. We will be working on our final education decision for them next week, as well as their first American pediatrician appointment. We truly believe they are older than their records indicate, and want to see how they graph out on the Asian growth chart as "just turned" 10 year olds! I am placing my bet right now that they'll be completely off the chart huge for that! We do have the option of changing their birth year as we readopt them in the U.S., so pray for wisdom in both of these "gray" areas.
Monday, July 13, 2009
The biggest surprise!
The past 5 days have gone so well and have been full of more home-cooked meals around the table, fun preparing food together, and relaxing and having fun outside than this family has seen in awhile! We spent all evening after their birthday celebration discovering that Hopscotch is a universal game, these Chinese girls can hula hoop effortlessly and almost with no movement while their new American family looks SAD in their attempts, they can jump rope backwards, (but mom can still make it down the driveway and back jumping rope and almost have enough oxygen at the end...) Jenna still remembers her girly days making hopskotch "marathons" down the entire driveway that proved to be hilarious fun as well as a way to work off the birthday cake! Our neighbors, the Thames, spontaneously came over to join the fun with some fresh blueberries and lemon-blueberry bars for us, and we honestly hadn't spent any time with neighbors in quite some time. Tony sat outside with Jenna and read a book while Jenna made her chalk masterpiece and the girls and I made dinner. As I took this new pattern emerging and pondered it, I thought that it can only be in God's Kingdom where the first is last and the greatest is a servant, that you can actually add 2 more children from an entirely different culture and language, become a large family, and actually slow down and relax more! I love the dynamic that younger kids adds to the family, and I have part of my faith in that verse of "Blessed is he whose quiver is full of them (children)" turning to sight in this 2nd week home. Once again, join me in praising the One who has given His life to restore us to abundant life!
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